Tag Archives: help

Help Wanted – Hard Work & High Reward

I am looking for a new hire. There is no travel, there is no set hours, and you can perform the job from anywhere. Whether you are grocery shopping or laying out by the pool. Of course there is no cash involved, but the payout can be just as beneficial and at times priceless.

You probably thinking this is a scam, but it’s not. The job I’m referring to are random acts of kindness. While you may be rolling your eyes I can promise you that if you are looking for a way out of your situation or victim mindset then this can help.

I admit there are times I myself have to force myself to come about to perform the act and there are times I have kicked myself for not thinking about helping as the moment has passed. However, the more you do the better you will feel.

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I rarely “feel” like helping someone before I do it, but I always “feel” good about performing it. Maybe it’s not selfless, but it’s sure not selfish. I’m not talking about throwing money at situations. This can help, but I’ve found it rarely feels as good as getting physically involved.

I often try to make time to help my friends out by patching a roof or by fixing a random item around the house, but I find holding a door, flashing a smile, handing someone something they’ve dropped, and other random things like this, while seeming effortless, can make a big impact on others whether they know it or not.

I have had a lot of people not even thank me when I do something for them, but a lot of times I’ve had others comment on what I did that weren’t directly effected by the random act, but just witnessed it.

When I was laid off with nothing to do, but work out and apply for jobs I would always try and do things for others. Little odds and ends and one gentleman from one of the volunteer activities I had gotten involved with saw me and asked what I did I explained to him my profession and he happened to work with a firm locally that he ended up getting me a job with. It is the best job I’ve had and has given me opportunities that I couldn’t have imagined 5 years ago.

This man works with another firm and still calls me to this day offering me jobs and while I appreciate it, and the offers always get better, I am completely happy with my current position and opportunities. That one act landed me a job when I was looking, but was not expecting it at that venue and it got me a job better than the one I had previously.

I also was never able during that two months to ever feel sorry for myself and become the victim of that economy. In fact it was the opposite, I felt like a rock star. I increased my pay from the previous job by three times and I was the youngest member in the company in that position all in a one year period.

On the opposite end of the spectrum I watched as a gentleman within the company got passed up for a position that he put his time and effort into and he use to ask me for advice at lunch and I remember him telling me he felt like the wind had been taken out of his sail. To which I responded it just meant he had to row till he found the wind again. It takes a little effort, but eventually it would pick back up. Also, by focusing helping on the new boss, no matter your stance, and helping him it would not only take his mind off the wrong that he felt, but it would also help the company.

Unfortunately he didn’t listen and became offended and left the company. Now if he would have just stopped looking at the situation as a victim the gentleman that took his position didn’t even last a year and this gentleman would have been perfect for the position if he’d have just stuck it out a little while longer. Instead he had the victim mentality unfortunately. Don’t get me wrong he was a great guy and great at his job, but just got stuck in that mentality at the time, which only hurt him in the long run.

I wanted to share both of these because one way to stop focusing on your situation is to focus on others and just reminding yourself that while there are situations that effect you they can only effect you to the extent you let them.

Pain is inevitable and lasts for a minute, but it’s up to you how long the pain will effect you by what you do after that pain to cause you to fail or succeed.

My father use to tell me there is no use in crying over spilt milk. He is right the milk spilled and the longer you look at it and cry the further it spreads. Same is true with focusing on yourself for to long. The longer you look at the pain the longer it will stay there and on top of that the more pain you will find.

Just remember no one is perfect and if we look long enough at ourselves we will find the imperfections and focus on them. Try not to focus solely on the situation at hand and how it affects you, but instead focus on the effects of the situation and the needs of others. That could include family, friends, or strangers. In the long run you will see the benefits yourself.

Remember life’s not a sprint it’s a marathon. Pace yourself, if you haven’t been training the way you should you’ll wear yourself out.

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Goals

In my life I have learned that 90% of what has happened to me, both good and bad, has come from my mentality. I would say that looking at every situation in the right light with the right mind set there is not a situation that has defeated me. From drug addiction to death I have been blessed to be given the tools to overcome these situations and turned them to positive victories in my life. While I had some guides to conquer these issues I ventured through these without too much help other than my own mindset. My goal is to share with everyone this mindset and views to help others come through this with less pain and more success than I have. I would like to warn most I am not perfect and this topic is one, that I’ve found’ is most liked to be discussed, but fewest actually liked to be corrected. Not everyone will like my point of view, but I promise it works. It has for me and my friends and I want everyone that is willing to, to replace the ‘im’ with the ‘or’ in what I like to call the ‘vict’ or in other words your mindset. So please feel free to ask and share and I want us to grow together in being victors.